Conversation starters

I find it kind of funny that these days anything that we do that grandma doesn't approve of gets pinned on my aunt Sharon. It's not fair to her, I suppose, but it's still kind of funny how much grandma seems hellbent on turning her sister into an absolute demon. Grandma takes stories and rearranges them until they're satisfactory to her.

And yet I can't bring myself to feel overly sorry for my aunt. She has gone out of her way to shun me since the day I was born, to the point of being extremely rude in my physical presence. Every time I have met her, I have made a point to say hello and each time she has looked at me and then walked away without saying anything.

I don't expect everyone in the world to like me, but from my blood relatives especially, I expect a minimum level of politeness and respect, none of which I have ever received from her. On the other hand, she showers my other cousins with gifts, up until a point, because she can't stand to actually spend any money for anything. This favouratism is a sore point between her and my grandmother who thinks all her grandchildren should be treated equally.

As always her excuse is that she doesn't know any of us so she can't start a conversation, like, not even about the weather or school or any of those banal things that people talk about when they don't know what to say.

But I leave it up to her because if I had to start the conversation I'd still ask something like: How was your hysterectomy? or Are you sure that after twenty years of working at a mental hospital that a little bit of the crazy didn't rub off? Do you hate me, or do you just hate me? What kinds of cat torture methods would you recommend? I've been trying to get mine to act as feral and insane as yours without success...

I wouldn't do it to be rude, I just don't know what to say either.